We are all free to make the choices we want to in life. Many times, however, we tell our selves the story that we aren’t free. That we’re stuck, we didn’t choose this, we can’t do something about. But these are all lies.
We all have the power of choice and learning to own your choices can help set you free in your current situation or your life.
Think of the instance where a gal named Susan is stuck in a job she doesn’t like. The story she might tell is,
“I hate my job, but I can’t leave because there aren’t any good jobs out there. In that story, Susan has no control and is stuck in a situation that makes her unhappy.”
Think of another story where Jack lives in a home that’s underwater/upside down; meaning he owes more on his home than it is worth. Jack might tell the story that he is unable to move to a new town, or find a bigger home because his current home is underwater. Again Jack is stuck and not in control of his life.
When we feel out of control or helpless in our lives, it creates all kinds of negative emotions and feelings. As this condition of helplessness persists we begin a downward spiral, seeing the negative of our situation and then looking for people to blame.
The reality is we are all in control of our lives. Control of your life begins with claiming your power of choice.
Let’s re-tell Susan and Jack’s stories and put them back in the driver’s seat.
When Susan claims her power of choice it might sound like this… “You know, I really hate my job right now, but I’m choosing to stay in my job because the idea of looking for a new job or being without income feels worse than staying here.”
The day that staying in a job she hates feels worse than the risk of being without a job, or the effort of finding a new one is the day she can choose to change her situation, but for now, regardless of how bad it is, she is choosing to stay.
Let’s listen to Jack’s story when he owns his choices…
“Gosh, I’d really love more storage space and a home office, but my house is upside down. I could short sell it, or foreclose and rent a bigger house for the same price but that feels financially irresponsible and I like owning a house, so for now, I’m choosing to stay and see what the market does.”
This puts Jack back in the driver’s seat. He is choosing to stay. There is always a choice, but when we don’t like the consequences we like to tell others, and ourselves “That we have no choice.”
It’s the same thing with time. I catch myself saying, “Oh, I haven’t had time to do that yet.” I try to make a conscious effort to shift my language to, “I actually haven’t prioritized that yet, or, I haven’t carved out the time to do that.” Everyone has 24 hours in a day it’s what we choose to do with it that creates our life.
Owning your choices puts you right back in the driver’s seat of your life. So remember, saying, “I can’t” is like crawling into the backseat of your life and wondering why the car isn’t moving.” Instead say, “I choose to ….” And notice how great it feels to back in control.