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Over a glass of Syrah from Spain last week, I began talking to a small group of people about the art of good living. We decided since we were enjoying good wine and company at Apres Wine Bar in South Lake Tahoe, the five of us were already on our way.

To set the context, my definition of good living includes a life you want to savor, variety, delicious conversation, joy, giving and bliss daily. There are many different definitions, this is just mine.

From the conversation we came up with these first 10 tips for Good Living.

Step One: Good Wine
When you drink wine, the grape calls you to be present, the glass shines, the color is rich, the nose is a feast of scents and generally the setting is relaxed. We can use all of these things to savor each day in our life. Using all of the senses to fully appreciate and notice wine is a great metaphor for appreciating and noticing life.

Step Two: Good Food
Healthy, body fueling, colorful, organic, delicious food. Good living means recognizing when you’ve had enough to satisfy your hunger or craving. Good living means trying new flavors, textures and combination’s in all ares of your life.

Step Three: Good Company
Surround yourself with good friends, people who support your soul’s desire.

Step Four: Good Music
Music makes your heart sing, your emotions perk up and can encourage you to work harder when exercising. Listen your way to a Good Life!

Step Five: Good Pairing
My new friend Anthony from Berkeley, CA mentioned pairing good wine and food for exponential enjoyment. This got me thinking about pairing many different things. Like riding your cruiser to work. working from home, combining husband wife time while spending a day with the family… What can you pair to increase your enjoyment of life?

Step Six: Listening
Start listening between the lines, and to what is not said. You’ll find you here things that are fascinating.

Step Seven: Love Something
Love fuels the good life. If you are single love a friend, a family member, yourself. If you need or want more love, find “something” to love. A hobby, movie or book.

Step Eight: Keep a Positive Outlook - From Becky at Sprouts
Easy, look for the good, be a glass half full kind of person.

Step Nine: Have a Zest for Adventure - From Anthony from Berkeley
If you can afford to, go everywhere. If you can’t try one day get a ways, or just
watch the travel channel.

Step Ten: Pay it Forward – Daniel from Apres Wine Bar
Give back when you can. Help others. Be Kind. Pay it forward.

Share your tips for good living in the comments section!

The only constant in life is change. I’ve heard that all of my life. Just when we get comfortable with how things are running, life throws a change at us. So how do you manage the cycle of change?

Start by Understanding the Cycle of Change.
There are four stages to the cycle of change according to Dr. Martha Beck…

Death and Rebirth
Dreaming and Scheming
The Hero’s Saga
The Promised Land

People who understand the cycle of change fair better during the change cycle and are more satisfied with the outcome.

In Death and Rebirth, we loose our identity. I was single now I’m married. I was a college student, now I’m jobless with a BA degree. I was a homeowner, now I’m someone who foreclosed. Whatever the event, Shock, Opportunity or Transition it changes your identity starting this cycle moving.

The mantra for stage one is, “I don’t know what the heck is going on, and that’s okay”
This is the stage for dissolving fears, thoughts, and beliefs that don’t serve you. This is also the stage for grieving the previous identity and it’s loss. You will feel confused and that’s normal.

Stage Two Dreaming and Scheming is when you come up with loads of different ideas for where to go and how to redefine yourself. This is the stage for trying on ideas and identities. You are married now, will you be a Mrs. Cleaver? Will you be a hyphenated working wife, how about a stay at home making dinner and cookies kind of wife. Then when you’ve landed on and idea that sticks you begin to scheme how to attain that. Go for it, the mantra here is “There are no rules”

Stage Three The Hero’s Saga is when you get your rubber to the road. No more thoughts, now it’s time for action. In this stage we fail… A LOT. So, you learn from each failure, you make huge adjustments and you keep trying until you get it right. Think Spiderman, it takes three movies before he gets his girl and best friend back. The mantra here is “This is taking much longer than I thought and it is much harder than I thought and that’s okay”. Just keep going, roadblocks and frustration are really normal here.

Stage Four The Promised Land is where you are cruising along and making minor adjustments to a pretty good system. This is the time to enjoy and be grateful for all that you’ve been through. The mantra of course is your reality check… “Change is coming and that’s okay”.

For more detailed information on the cycle of change and what to do during each stage of the cycle, look for the recording on our Radio Blog Page or email me at alexis@nourishbusiness.com.

How to Slay an Energy Vampire…

Do you dread it when people ask you if they can bend your ear? Do you want to be a good friend but sometimes listening to your friend’s problem becomes way too much? Today on KTHO’s The Bright Side, we are talking about how to manage these energy vampires without damaging your relationship.

First things first! Know an energy vampire when you see one –

Your friend or family member might be an energy vampire if…

-Every time someone asks them how they are, they tell you what horrible thing happened to them this week

-You need a nap after talking to the person

-You feel drained after listening to them tell their story

-They are always looking for advice and even after you give them your honest opinion they find ways to discredit your thoughts and find things wrong with the solution you offered.

-They complain…A lot

-Someone wrongs them and they retell the story to anyone who will listen (namely you) and then they tell you again the next time they see you.

-When they invite you places, you immediately decide to work on the weekend so you’ll have an excuse not to go.

If any of these are sounding familiar, you might be getting drained by an energy vampire disguised as your friend, brother, husband, sister, or mother. Most of us are touched when someone comes to us for help or advice and honored to share and help them out. But what can you do when it begins to drain you of your good positive energy and you begin to take on their negative energy?

Detach from the outcome
If you care about a friend or family member and you give them good advice, it can be upsetting when they go do the opposite of what you told them. The best thing you can do for someone is listen, state your opinion if they ask for it, then detach from what the final outcome it. Example:
Mary Says – Should I take this job at the accounting firm?
Bill Says – You have always loathed accounting, it’s far from home, and the hours would be hard on your family. You should look for something else.
Mary Says – Oh you are right Bill, I think I will
2 weeks later
Mary Says – Bill did I tell you I took the accounting job
Bill Says (in his head) – Why do I even bother telling her my opinion if she doesn’t care? $%$***!!!
If Bill detaches from the outcome, he is not invested in the decision.
Bill Says (outloud) – Oh yeah? Good for you.

Don’t ask for details

When someone begins to unload on you and it feels negative, don’t encourage the conversation. Refrain from asking additional questions which could lead to more negative information and a longer conversation. Giving attention to people when they act negatively reinforces the behavior. Reduce the amount of feed back you give. Example: “Oh you have a bad boss, what makes him so bad?” turns to “Oh you have a bad boss, that’s unfortunate.”

Change the subject

Acknowledge the person’s situation. “Oh you have a bad boss, I’m sorry to hear that. What should we have for lunch?” Sometimes people are caught up in their own tragic situation and just need a way to get off the subject. Offer another situation for the two of you to talk about. You can shift gears by saying, “Hey that reminds me, did I tell you about the new project I’m working on?” Give them and yourself a way out.

Set Boundaries

If your energy vampire constantly talks about how disorganized they are, but does nothing about it after 4-5 mentions. Set boundaries on the subject… for example, “I’m not going to talk to you about how disorganized you are at work anymore until you do something to change it. I love you but you’re driving me bonkers.”

Ask and give fair warning

We all have negative things that have to be discussed with a loved one or friend from time to time, but if you let them know in advance they have time to mentally prepare. For example, “Honey, put on your bubble suit, I have to tell you something about our friends the Smiths”. He knows immediately that it’s bad news, so he is ready. What is a bubble suit? It’s an emotional coat of armor. You put on a bubble suit to protect yourself from bad energy or bad news.

My friend Jill and I used to go to lunch together and if anyone had to share bad news, we’d say, “Put on your bubble suit”. Then one of us would fake inflating our suit and bubble helmet and start cracking up. It gave us a safe space to “vent” without dumping on each other. It also forces us to recognize when we are disseminating bad news and determine if it’s necessary to share it at all.

So don’t loose a friendship over multiple energy sucking talks, just set some personal boundaries for yourself and resist giving into the negativity.

Situation: You have a side job that you love, but you are afraid to do it full time because you aren’t rich or famous? You want to make a business out of your side job, but are you ready? Here are three steps to helping your find your way from side hustle to full time entrepreneur without falling on your face.

Step One: Build Your Business While You Are Still Working Full Time
Take advantage of working a full time job and financial security before you leap into a small business venture. Use the time to work lunch hours, weekends and nights on the following:
- Build your reputation in your community
-Create your brand
-Determine who your ideal customer is
-What is your ideal customer’s problem?
-Determine how your product or service will solve their problem
-Market Yourself
-Create strategic partnerships
-Try different pricing strategies and see what works
-Time your projects
-Write a business plan
-Get business coaching through the SBDC or Local Chamber
-Set up your operating and accounting systems
-Blog and get yourself and your voice out there
Building while you work full time is a great way to experiment, research and build a solid foundation for moving forward with a business. You’ll know if you are really excited and committed to making your side job a full time career if you don’t mind working on it after hours.

Step Two: Know When You Are Ready
-You have your debts paid off (outside of mortgage and a car payment)
-You have at least 3-6 months of living and business expenses to survive on while you launch
-Know your worst case scenario. When will I know to abandon ship?
-You have support from friends, family and professional associates
-People know you for your trade
-You have clients and prospects lined up
-You know exactly who your customers are and what problem you solve for them and you can easily articulate that in 30 seconds or less
-You have an established brand, marketing plan and business cards
-Your website is up and you know how to update it yourself

Step Three – Creating A Leap Line
Start with a line notating “Today/Current State” then end with your “Leap of Faith”. In between those two points put in all of the steps your need to take to get to your leap of faith. If you get to a point that you aren’t sure what step to take write, “RESEARCH”. Put the date you’d like to leap on, for instance one year from today; then figure out how much time you need to spend on each step in between and add 25% for all the times you will learn from your mistakes along the way. You can see if your leap date is realistic or if it’s too soon. Once you have the date set, you will have a road map for how to get to the safe leaping point.

The key is to prepare as much as you can while you are in a salaried environment, so that the leap isn’t terrifying, and the landing will be as soft as possible. Remember once you land you’ll want to charge ahead with your idea!

One very important Caveat: Now and again this process will show you that your side business isn’t ready or isn’t sustainable as a full time business. When that happens, enjoy your side job, and keep a day job.

Post your leap of faith date and what you are going to do in our comment section.

I recently watched and incredible video about Social Media by Erik Qualman. The facts were startling. Things like, 50% of our population is under 30 years old and If Facebook were a country it would be the third largest in the world. I highly recommend checking it out on www.socialnomics.com.

It got me thinking about a lot of my clients. Some are very social network savvy and others well, they don’t know a tweet from a fleet. So I thought I’d give you a few tips on how to use social media for your business.

1. Set up a business page on Facebook, and encourage people to “Check In” when they come to your establishment. (You can view Nourish’s Business Page on Facebook for an example.

2. Offer free tips and advice. Example: If you are a cleaning company, tell people how to get gum out of their carpet or what your favorite “green” cleaning products are.

3. Share what you are doing that is socially responsible.

4. Put a “Like Button” on your website’s home page.

5. Post photos of your work… Houses you’ve built, websites you’ve designed, you teaching a class

6. Upload videos with tips or information about your business. (Keep it to 1 minute or less)

7. Recommend Books

8. Share your success. Think about it as the art of self promotion.

9. Get your employees to “like” their client’s Facebook Pages.

10. Check out a future employee’s profile on Linked in for a quick job history, and see if you know anyone that they are connected to.

11. Repost your client’s videos or tweets, or articles to help promote their business.

12. Find out what people are saying about your company and respond to them and their questions.

These are some basic ways to get involved on social media. 10 minutes a day. Don’t over think it, just get to it!

Share your tips in our comment section.

2.

Loneliness comes in all forms and sizes from feeling a little blue and bored to major depression and solitary living. About a year ago, I stumbled upon loneliness. I had moved back to Lake Tahoe, spent a year getting back into the groove of things reconnected with old friends and didn’t do much about nurturing new relationships. Then, in the span of a week two of my best friends announced they were moving away… one to San Diego and the other to Utah. I was devastated. It took a good while to realize that the sadness that kept creeping up was loneliness.

I have always had lots of friends, and kept a few very close to my heart. But life had taken the close few away and left me feeling empty. I’m not alone here. If you google “overcoming loneliness” you get pages and pages of advice on how to do it. Here is mine.

Get Real
Ask yourself, am I really alone here? When you reflect on your lonely feelings, think about if it’s true that you are alone? Many people are surrounded by friends, acquaintances and family members that love them. Realizing that you aren’t alone is the first step. Most of us aren’t truly alone alone. We are just lacking a confidant or best friend.

Take Responsibility
Think about what you have done to create friendships, meet new people and put yourself out there. If the answer is nothing, then great, the next step is easy–get out there and shake the trees. If you have been trying to meet people and it isn’t working, review what approach you’ve been using. Why might it be failing? Are you trying to make friends with someone who doesn’t share common interests? Are you trying to plan things with someone who is incredibly busy or on the road all of the time?
Are you graspy, when trying to make friends? Check your energy and work towards a fun and carefree attitude vs. a needy and desperate one.

Find Your Fun – Find Your Passion
The best way to meet like minded people is to get out and do the things that you love. When people are doing what they love they are generally happy, and emitting a positive energy that attracts others to them. It also ensures that you’ll find friends who like to do the same things. If you meet someone at a film festival, and you love movies, chances are they will too. If you join a knitting group because you love to create scarves and booties, you’ll probably meet someone who would be open to spending time knitting too.

When I was 27, I was single, with no chance of finding a boyfriend let alone a husband; so I left San Diego to live and travel in France. I loved the mountains and snowboarding, and thought, if I’m going to be alone, I might as well be alone doing something really cool. So off I went to adventure through Europe. Guess who I met there? My husband, who was doing what he loved. It makes things quite easy to sustain a great relationship when both people like doing the same things.

Be Consistent
If you want to meet total strangers, frequent the same places at the same times. For example go to church at the same time and sit in the same general area. Hit up the same coffee shop every Friday morning at 8am. Go to the same gym class each week. The repetitiveness will create a familiarity with others who have the same routine, then it’s easy to start by saying hi, then introducing yourself.

Allow People In
When someone reaches out to you, try not to be shy. Engage with them and get a conversation started. I met one of my favorite friends at my kid’s school bus stop. The second day of school we made some small talk and by the end of the second week, we were setting up dinner parties for our families. Don’t be afraid to invite people to do things. They might say no because they are busy, but suggest another time, or ask them to tell you what times would be good for them.

Say Yes
If you are lonely and someone asks you to go to an event, GO. When we get into a funk and our self esteem starts to droop down due to our perceived loneliness then we tend to say no. I have clients who tell me, well they wouldn’t want my company. Don’t make people beg you to join them. Say yes to their invitations. Who knows it might be fun after all. Or at least give you something to talk about.

Being lonely sucks, I know; but fixing it is up to you. Take control of your life, and present condition, and commit to doing something to change it. Shake the trees– Go new places, try new classes, talk to people in Starbucks, sit at the bar for dinner, join a club. To get what you want you must do what you have never done. If it aint working change it! You never know, there might just be someone out there that wants a new friend as much as you do.

Tell us a story about how you’ve made a friend… Comment Below.
Here are some of my friends…

Met through my husband’s work! The fabulous Jen and Jorge

Dave and Jamie – Met over the fence when they first moved in

Jill – Started a job at the same time and were instant friends

Sarah P – Met at a La Leche Group when we were both new mom’s along with 3 other friendships

Kilty! My wonderful friend that I met at the bus stop

It is June 6th and there was snow on the ground today. That is depressing. The whole town of Tahoe is in a funk and yes, I can say without doubt it’s due to the weather.
This weekend it rained a lot. But in between the rain, there was sunshine, just above the clouds and for the entire day, I would see it pop out of the clouds and I’d run outside and soak it in. It was a lazy Sunday, so I had time to drop everything and enjoy the sun. It got me thinking metaphorically that the sun is just one of life’s good things. It’s warm, healing, deliciously uplifting and for the moment only available in Lake Tahoe in very small doses.

So how can you find your sunshine above the clouds?

Step One: Know in your heart that it’s always there.
When we fly on an airplane, it is guaranteed that after about 20,000 feet the sun is always shining during the day time. So even when we feel like it will never return, it makes us feel better to know that some day it will because it’s still there. In fact I wore my sunglasses today just to let the sun know that I was ready should it decide to show up.

Step Two: Focus on the positive.
So it’s snowing in June, but let’s look on the bright side. The water is good for our lawns and we don’t have to sneak out and water on off days at midnight. I get one more opportunity to wear my Smartwool sweater that is oh so cute, but too hot for the summer months. I sleep well because my bedroom is not 90 degrees. Better yet, my children sleep well due to the chill in the house. I can be sure the snow will have melted by the time I get home, so shoveling can be ignored all together. I haven’t had to switched to iced coffee yet. The mosquitos continue to die off each time it snows which pleases me greatly. I didn’t buy any annuals yet and am feeling really good about that decision. The beginnings of yellow pollen keep getting washed away. My kids don’t have spring fever yet, and are still focused at school. It’s not a tornado, or a tsunami or an earthquake. Even better, you’ve received a one month extension on your get in shape for summer project!

Step Three: Ask for Help out of your Funk
If you are swirling in the vortex of despair due to the weather, call a friend and ask for help getting out of your funk. Get goofy, go see a movie without feeling bad about burning daylight. Simply call your partner, friend or colleague and say, “I’m in a funk. This weather has got me down. Let’s plan something to cheer ourselves up!” Call a friend in Arizona and ask to come for a weekend get away. Drive to the desert and soak up some dry heat. You can go to the sun.

Step Four: Look at What you are Putting Up With?
If you are tired of the weather, don’t put up with it! Decide to change it. Each day I go to work, I crank up the heat so I feel like it’s summer. It might be 40 outside, but it’s 70 inside and I like it. Stop waiting for a nice day to go hike, or go for a bike ride. Suit up and brave the elements. We are mountain people, we’re built for this. Take the gondola up and snow shoe above the cloud layer. Reach for the sun, get outside, but for whatever it’s worth, don’t put up with the weather.

Step Five: Nurture Yourself
Enjoy some self nurturing if you are feeling in a funk. Draw a hot bath, do a yoga class (bikram preferably because it feels like Arizona), cook a fabulous meal and share it with friends, open up a great bottle of wine that you’ve been saving, take a nap, read your favorite book without any guilt right smack in the middle of the day, buy yourself a little summer frock, I promise one of these days the sun will come out and you’ll want to be ready.

Step Six: Change your Focus
When we constantly check the weather only to find clouds, thunder storms, rain, snow, we just torture our own existence. Think about how many times you have said, “I’m so over this”. I said the other day, “I’m so over the snow I’m under it”. Then I got to thinking, you are right Alexis, you are totally burying yourself in the icy cold layer of snow. It’s time to let your light shine. Start focusing on the sunshine in other people, not in the sky. It will warm you right up from the inside out. Focus on how green the meadows are and how strong and gorgeous the waterfalls and rivers are this year. Just start enjoying life today. If you wait for the sun to come out to enjoy life again, you’ll have lost months of opportunities to shine from the inside.

After all “Here comes the sun….”
Share your own tips in the comment section.

Disappointment is so disappointing. Yesterday was Stage One of the Tour de California – Amgen’s Big Bike Race. The people of Lake Tahoe had been preparing and planning for months to create a world class event. And then came the forecast for snow, first 70% chance, then a 90% chance. As we basked in the 70 degree’s day’s leading up to the race, there was fear, but truly there was hope that the weather guys had it all wrong. Maybe by some rogue chance, the sun would shine and the riders would get their turn to race around the Jewel of the Sierra’s.

At 12pm on Sunday, we checked Facebook and tuned into our local radio KTHO 96.1 for an update, the snow was falling, but not sticking.. The race was on! At 1:05pm, we bundled up the kids in the only cozy clothes that hadn’t been packed away and took our place at the edge of Highway 50 to watch the cyclists come by. One by one the neighbors came out, cow bells rang and police vehicles cleared the path. You could feel the energy in the community, people were fired up, and outside despite the freezing conditions. The race was on. And then from an open car window, I heard it… The race was canceled. It was too dangerous, the riders had decided, and the risk was too great. There we all were, gathered in the cold with nothing to cheer for. People lingered as if maybe we heard wrong. And then one by one, they left, disappointed. None more than me.

It took me a good few hours to get over the disappointment. I found that funny because, I’m not even that into cycling. So, I reflected. And I came up with how to get over it. Here are some ways to work through your frustration and disappointment…

Step One: Accept what is.
It is generally not what happens that causes us pain, but what we think should have happened that causes the pain. We focus on how it could have been, what it would have or should have been like. Then when those thoughts don’t match up with what really transpired we get bummed out and sometimes downright angry. The first step is to accept what is. The snow and weather was horrible and the conditions were dangerous. The race was canceled. There is no reason to keep going over how it should have been. It wasn’t, so now move on.

Step Two: Examine your thoughts about what should be.
Is it true that the race should have happened? Is it true that it shouldn’t have snowed? What are you making it mean that the race didn’t happen? When I started to investigate my thoughts, I realized that I wanted to be part of something big that brought the community of Lake Tahoe together, regardless of what side of town you lived on. I wanted to feel that energy that swells in a crowd of excited enthusiastic people. I wanted to be part of something positive after years of a bad economy, split Chambers, competition between ski resorts, spiraling housing values, and the big hole in the ground. I realized that it wasn’t the lack of fast moving spandex and cow bells that I was sad to miss, it was the sense of positive community collaboration that I longed for. That helped me understand why I had been so affected by the last minute change.

Step Three: Find your consolation prize.
On the way to buy some last minute gifts at the Y, I pulled out in front of a team of cyclists that had decided to ride to North Shore despite the conditions. I was so excited for my little slice of Amgen, that I pulled into a parking lot and waited for them to pass and cheered them on. I wasn’t the only one, some gal in a truck was honking and giving them a thumbs up in the lane next to them. It was enough. Just a slice of what I had hoped for. Me and another person who I didn’t know from Adam, coming together to cheer on the team of six riders who were braving the storm.

Step Four: Begin looking forward.
Start thinking about the next bike race, the next community event, the next opportunity to gather as a community and collaborate! I began to think about future events, like the Lake Tahoe Marathon, or America’s Most Beautiful Bike Ride, or The Sample of the Sierra. I got excited and my disappointment began to fade away.

And Finally: If you need it, take time to grieve.
If after all of the steps above, you are still saddened and deeply disappointed, then you need to allow yourself some time to grieve the loss. If you, like so many in our community poured your heart and soul into the event, then you have the right to feel the sting of disappointment. For you have lost something. Over time you can revisit the steps above, but until then, find a quiet place and enjoy a good lament.

I hope that we’ll have the opportunity next year and that maybe they’ll consider ending the final stage in Tahoe. Just imagine, the crystal blue beauty of the shimmering lake, people in lawn chairs with sun hats and cow bells, cyclists with their jerseys open pouring water over their heads to cool off and the whole community rallied around something positive that we can all agree upon.

It’s time to get your creative cap on. I’m often struck by creative ideas in the middle of the night or while driving, and then I have days where I need to get creative and I’m stumped. Inspiring your creative brain can be difficult or fun, depending on how you look at it. These are some of my favorite ways to get my creative flow going.

Brainstorm: There are no rules here, just a free for all storm of ideas. I try to get out of the box and come up with very silly things to keep the ideas churning. Start with a topic, perhaps an event idea and then go for your life. Don’t hold back because an idea is illegal or expensive, just throw it into the mix. Sometimes, the most hair brained ideas are the one’s that help you hone in on the idea you’ll run with!

Visual Stimulation: Grab a bunch of magazines around an the type of idea you are brainstorming and look for visual ideas that stimulate thought. I often do this with clients when creating their vision statements. We talk about what makes them different or unique and then look for pictures to support it. Once a gal on a marketing team found an advertisement of a UPS delivery man and she said, I picked this because we always deliver our results on time!

Get Moving: Getting creative means engaging your right brain and getting moving can help with that. Either got for a walk, a spin, a jog, or do something like tracking animal prints in the meadow around your home, or along the sand at the beach. Tracking engages your right and left brain for total noggin stimulation!

Gather the Troops: Find your favorite people to think with and start talking about your ideas. Getting input from others can stimulate your creativity and it can make you think of more exciting new ideas that would have never crossed your mind. It helps to have people that are good at different things in the group to work through ideas. Ex. Someone who is detail oriented, the dreamer, the doer, the quiet but brilliant friend. Getting together people who think differently will help look at your situation from many different angles.

Get Some Rest: Trying to get creative on no sleep can be tough, sometimes you just need to zone out and forget about it. Give your mind some time to settle and come back to your creative process when you are fresh.

Lastly…. Clear the Way When beginning to write this blog today I had a deadline on my brain. Creatively I was a dead fish. Zero good ideas. So, I took care of my deadline first to allow my creative flow all of the band with it needed to get the blog done. If something is weighing on your mind, deal with it first and come back to your creative genius.

Get inspired, get creative. The world needs your work and ideas. They are good and you should share them. Even if they aren’t good, they might inspire another idea that is great!

I have just returned from a weeks vacation in Palm Desert, CA and I am feeling so rejuvenated. Why do you ask? Because I unplugged. I vacationed without working, checking my email or calling anyone.

When was the last time you did that? When was the last time you took time off and really unplugged from work? Are you the guy who checks email three times a day while cruising the Caribbean? Or the gal who keeps ups with her stack of work via iPhone during her child’s soccer game?

In the age of technology, we have become so addicted to our smart phones and lap tops, now iPads, that for many people it has become extremely hard to let go of them.

I’ve heard all of the excuses of how work stacks up when you are gone for a week and it’s worse to come back to. Or how you might lose the sale if you aren’t available 24/7. But the reality is if you are never disconnecting from your work for even a day or two you are probably becoming diluted.

What does that even mean? People who are well rested and fully able to disconnect/ unplug from work are more like Espresso when they return vs. people who never take a break are more like diluted iced tea that’s been sitting in the sun with an old soggy lemon. Yep, it’s true. The myth that those who work into the wee hours of the night and during vacation are better performers has been broken.

Rest is a key element to our health and most of us aren’t getting enough of it. True rest is undisturbed mental white space. Where you can be fully present and literally forget about work. Unplug from your in box, your to do list and your answering service. Let go for just a couple of days and watch the magic that happens.

If you are reading this saying, oh that’s not possible, things wouldn’t go on without me, then you have a problem. Either, you aren’t setting boundaries with your clients, you aren’t hiring the right people, or you aren’t training or empowering them to do things that are meaningful.

If you want to unplug but can’t figure out how, then follow these steps:

If you are a Sole Proprietor
A month out let your weekly clients know that you will be taking a vacation. Just drop it into the conversation;
“I’m so excited to be heading to the desert next month for vacation. I’m going to totally unplug and relax.”

Offer to schedule people around your vacation time. “Let’s get you scheduled for the week I get back from vacation now while I’m wide open.”

Then set boundaries by letting your clients know that anything they need done before you leave has to be in to you by a certain date. Tell them you’ve promised to disconnect from work while you are gone.

Keep your promise. Don’t tempt yourself by checking your email, just leave it closed until you get back. Don’t listen to voicemails that come in from clients on your cell. Change your message at work to say you are out and not returning calls until the day you get back.

If you are working for a Company

Advertise your vacation to coworkers and clients.

Check with your boss to set expectations: “Hey boss, what important projects would you like me to have wrapped up before I go so that I can unplug and be sure you have what you need while I’m gone?”

Find a work buddy, and do a good job for them when they go on vacation so they’ll return the favor. Helping out a coworker while they are gone is a great way to help them unplug on their vacation. Be the person who takes care of things vs. leaving your colleague a note about it.

Let your clients know your time frame for getting things back to them before you leave.

If you think you’ll be coming back to a huge pile of work or email it’s best to tell your clients you return a day after you actually return so you aren’t inundated with calls the morning you return.

Be the espresso, not the weak iced tea. Your clients and your company will thank you for it.

If you can’t get away for vacation

Start by unplugging after work. Go home and resist the urge to bring work home.

Don’t check cell phone messages after work.

Don’t email at 8pm unless you want your clients to keep emailing you at night. Try this for a week and watch how your productivity increases. Well rested employees and business owners get twice as much done in half the amount of time then burned out people do.

UNPLUG